Former All Blacks star Nehe Milner-Skudder has opened up on the hardship of this year while speaking at the opening of New Zealand’s first Suicide Prevention Office.
The flying-winger, who is an ambassador for Headfirst, has had a disastrous year with injury, which has kept him sidelined throughout the entire year, and has suffered with injuries since his breakthrough year in 2015.
Speaking on his personal experience Milner-Skudder admitted that this year has been one of the toughest of his life due to the injuries he has sustained.
“For me, personally this has been one of the toughest years in my life, my career to date. Some of you may have noticed I haven’t taken the field at all this year, to not be able to do something or to do what you love doing… I really struggled. Out of all the injuries I’ve suffered, the many setbacks I’ve had in my career this was by far the hardest to digest. I’d built up in my head what this year was going to look like and I watched it shatter in pieces right in front of me and there was nothing I could do about it,” he said.
The 28-year-old was named Breakthrough Player of the Year in 2015 after winning the Rugby World Cup with New Zealand, but has only made a total of 13 appearances for the national side since and described how he isolated himself during his hard-time.
“I started to get these negative thoughts about being judged, distancing myself from others out of fear of what they might think, how it’d be played out in the media. It all took its toll. Although I’ve gone through these challenging times, I know I’m way better equipped to cope and work through them. I know what it feels like to get down, but I also know I am one of the few extremely lucky and privilege to have the resources to help me,” he added.
He went on to state that his career has helped him learn how to deal with the difficulties life has thrown at him and is delighted to be able to use his own experience with others through his involvement with Headfirst.
“My rugby career has taught me we all feel pressure and anxiety and we all get down at times, it’s easy to bottle things up, I’ve seen the negative effects that can have on myself and my teammates. Through this work I’ve discovered a lot about myself, and also realised things need to change around the stigma around mental health, masculinity in society and rugby. Being part of that change has been bloody important to me. Many of the participants, many of my teammates have come from the most at risk demographic, young, male Maori and Pasifika. It breaks me saying that,” he finished up.
Milner-Skudder is still in the process of recovering from an injury which has also prevented him from featuring for Toulon since signing last season. Hopefully he will be back in action soon as he has an incredible talent, but for now at least it is positive to hear that he is coping mentally with what has happened over the past while.
